dancebear8504 blogging at elowel.org
06-16-05 16:14
haha.. you gotta hear this:

i wake up at noon today... because i just was really tired.
I call my mom and she says 'you just got outta bed??'
and I say: yea, I had a nightmare last night.. and it made sleeping hard after that..
and she says: 'what was it about
and I say: 'ben and I getting back togather'
and she says: ' awww, honey, are you okay?'
HAHA. that's great.

really, it is a true story,though! I did have that bad dream - noooo good! maybe the tequila was kicking in really late and making CRAZY dreams!
I just had to tell me story!

Steph - I shall link some pics - make sure to look at my myspace though, i put some hotties on there (my husker boyfriend!)
!!! 06-14-05 20:56
Angela's birthday was the best time ever!! happy birthday!!!! :-) I love her... she's the coolest. :-) haha, that was a good night/morning. fun times. I have TONS of pictures, too! i'm sooo happy. thank you SOO much steph and ang for remembering (to take pics, unlike me)! haha!! :-) yay!
clicky pen!! :-) I love ____! haha.
hmph.. o! I'm so proud of myself! I went through ALL my pics on my comp, and organized and named them all! yay! now they all have places and names!
Our girls night before ang's was also very fun! I love those girls! all of them! I wish mel coulda come to, but it was all good! yay for girls nights! we need a sleepover soon!:)
I mowed the lawn today... for the first time (kinda sad.. i know). but, I gotta finish tomorrow. it's all good. i'm glad. and i got paid! haha :-)
I also got a book at the library yesterday - 1984 by George Orwell.. there's something about reading those proclaimed 'classics' that intrigues me and makes me feel smart. I wanna read alot this summer and continue that, because it's good for me. haha :-)
alright, this was a rendom post! I'll post later - and perhaps put some pics up.... perhaps.

<3 steph!
06-13-05 10:22
Hey everyone! I haven't posted in a while.. oops, sorry.. (if ya care). Haven't been up to a whole bunch. tryin' to work as much as possible - yea, that's about it. trying to have as much fun too.. but it really seems that if i don't call people, nobody really calls me (except a select one or two). that's a huge bummer, especially when it's people that always say we should hang out :-P. o well. I've been calling alot, this week was a little lazier.. but it was nice, sleep is good. :)
I've been talking to Eric again.. I missed him.. but I wasn't sure what we were doing. but, we both agree we can't do the exclusive thing again.. but, if we lived in the same state... haha, or city.. we'd do it. but, he doesn't even know where he might be sent and when.. so, that sucks. I hope he gets his leave.. cuz then maybe I can go down there or he could come here for a couple days.. that'd be awesome. If not, I might go up there for a few days because I have a credit for a flight since I can't go this week. sad sad. :( I mean, I guess I *could* have gone, but it's okay. I'll see him soon enough if I'm suppose to! yep.
Yep.. haha, I don't think there's too much more... ang's bday is tomorrow! yay!! :-) exciting.. I hope we can celebrate tonight!! :-) ;-) I have the next three days after today off.. I'm pretty excited. I'm going to be 'working' for my parents.. doing the yard work and mowing (the whole place.. lots to mow!) and some more outside stuff so that dad doesn't have to worry about it. He's gonna pay me $50/wk to do that for him. And mom is going to pay me $30/wk to keep up with cleaning the house, EVERYTHING. this is so that the two of them can really keep working on the addition without worrying about those little things. I'm looking forward to it, because I really need that extra money - really. I feel better about everything though, because I'm paying for lionettes this year, and my books and I'll start paying my car insurance soon. It makes me feel good, hopefully I'll get a great job in st. Charles next semester and perhaps start helping out a lot more. (even though mom got her great promotion! haha :-) YAY MOM! CONGRATS!!) It's all good. I wanna be independent!
Well, I think that's all. Gotta head to work in a while. I'm heading to the library to get some classics! :-) My goal is to read alot more starting this summer!
OOO OO!!! I didn't read it!! I'm sooooo proud of myself! ::pat on the back:: if you know what I'm talking about, you should be proud too! haha. :)

Alrighty, Bye bye! have a great day!!
<3 Steph
06-06-05 22:17
just one question:

Did she get a tattoo? And did you scold her for it?




UGH.
so many more things I've though of that I needed to say.. and that's bothering me. but I promised no more Stephani to "ruin" his life. O well. he's not worth it to me anymore.
06-04-05 11:16
well, i did it. i delivered the letter and ended it for me. I needed to do it, as closure. I told him that any sort of friendship is in his hands now, and I'm pretty sure I know what he'll do with it, but that's okay. I guess it's nice to have the closure.
Last night we went bowling. It was okay.. but I did get to see danny strain and mike clarke! that was crazy! haven't seen those guys in a while, I missed 'em!
After that I went home and then went over to Rusty's and watched 'The Patriot', haha. that was funny. :-) Then I got home about 4:30..oops... and went to sleep. I hope mom and dad aren't getting mad, I'm not trying to do anything wrong or take advantage that they're giving me freedom. I just, like going out right now. It's single life. lol. and college life. :-)
Well, this was a boring post, but I gotta get to work! so, talk to you all later! see you at CD tonight! :-)

<3 Steph
it's a biggun' 06-02-05 14:46
hello. hmmm... I remember there were some awesome things I wanted to post about.....
O YEA!
First, I saw Star Wars last night with my parents - it was AMAZING! AMAZING. truly incredible. I was so giddy to see it. and, it was so hard to hate anikin because he was so hott. urg. (that's just me) but it was amazing to just see all the answers kinda and just ::sigh:: it was good. lol. and the music always gives me the chills. really, it's so awesome. just like LOTR, that music is also truly awesome!
hmm... also, I had something said to me the other day that really brought my whole esteem up, and I feel I must share it because certain people (or person) has always torn me down for this, and to hear the complete opposite from someone else really helped me realize I might not be as horrible person as ben always made me out to be. So, we were talking about my car at work (me and bobbi) and just talking about when I got it and how i liked it and all that fun stuff. And somehow it came up to the fact that right now, i'm not paying for it, although I will be soon. and bobbi said to me that she had always admired me (since she's met me) of how grateful I am for everything I have. She said she knew I was spoiled, and I've never denied that, but she also said that I wasn't a spoiled brat, because I knew I was lucky to have what I have and that I am grateful for what I've been given. I was so shocked and so happy to hear that. When we dated, Ben would always tell me that I was a spoiled brat and I'd try to explain that I wasn't a brat about it, and that I was grateful, and he always shot me down. Now that I heard the opposite from somebody, I'm very happy. He always seemed to bring me down and chop me to half the size I really was, and I think I might be growing back to where I should be, the whole Stephani. Not the Stephani that thinks she needs another half to be whole. because, that's just silly. And I also realized that nobody should ever knock you down like that and make you feel like you are a horrible person, unless you think that yourself. I've always tried to think of others even though sometimes it wasn't as apparent as I'd hoped it to be. I mean, honestly, not alot of people can say that one of their dreams is to volunteer almost a year of their life and volunteer in Southern Africa and help the orphaned children and the AIDS infected areas. inside I feel like that's a special trait of mine, and nobody is going to knock that down. Whoever I end up with is going to love that I am a grateful person and that I do care about others and I care about this world and I care that other people know and care about other people in this world, too. One of my biggest pet peeves is people's (especially Americans) ignorance to the outside world and the suffering that goes on where people can't even get clean water and medicine - they don't even know how to worry about not being able to buy a new shirt or car and even getting the fancier foods.

O golly, that was kinda long, thank you to those who read it! :-) (if it ended up making any sense..)

hmm, what else...
o yea! I've kinda given up on rory in the sense that I always feel like I'm contacting him, and not vice versa, but I still like him, of course - he's one of the greatest guys I've ever met. But, I really have kinda moved my eyes onto someone else, ang might help me out with that. haha, sounds like we could be nerds together. Last night he asked me what period of history was my favorite. I thought it was ADORABLE! haha, and I actually wanted to talk about it, too! :-)

Umm, I can't recall anything else to gravely important, so, I guess I'll say adios for now! :-) bye bye!

<3, Steph
hello everybody. I'm doing good, a syou might be able to tell. good times good times.
let's see.....
I've had great times hanging out with everyone since I've been back! there's still a few more people I'd really like to see, but, it'll happen... eventually! once we're not all so busy. i've been doing lots of workin' lately, which is good, because my funds were depleted when I get home. I shall fix that! :-) I have very bad spending habits.. ooops.... o well. I'll be okay.
hmmm.. what else?
my boy 'situation' (if it can even be called a situation) is alright. I just can't tell - it's slightly driving me crazy, I haven't really worried about this sort of a thing in a LOOOOONG time.. the whole dating thing. but it's okay, I'll get my game back. I wish eric wasn't like 12 hours away.. it really stinks. if I had a list (which I basically do... I may post it later, it's pretty nice to have) he would fit just about all of the little 'requirements' on it. more than any other guy i've ever met. ::sigh:: o well.. if we're meant to be.. it'll work itself out eventually. for now, I just need a kiss! haha it'll happen soon enough.. i'm just scared to kiss rory, because, well, yea. he's amazing and I don't wanna ruin anything.
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oh yea! so, it's quite hilarious, I must mention this, also. so, you know.. ben's new girlfriend.. well, of course I tried to picture in my head what she was like, you know... what she looked like, her personality, all that good stuff. and it turns out - i was completely dead on about everything I guessed. ha. I guess you date somebody long enough.. you can picture who they'll date next. haha. i was slightly suprised it wasn't like one of those girls... but at the same time not... because they don't seem quite like his type. but yea, points for stephani.. :-) ha.
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I don't think there's too much more, i'll post my checklist later, it's nice, every girl should have one! :-)
05-30-05 08:39
The SECOND WORD IS/WAS SUCKS!!!!


HA.
05-29-05 21:34
i made really yummy cookies today! they're DELICIOUS! you should have some :-D i'm so proud of myself. yay!
smitten 05-29-05 11:11
all i can say is he is soooo adorable when he's sleepy/sleeping. ::sigh::



oh, and can we say hypocrite? i think we can..

Last night was great! I had a really good time with Liz and Steph and Eric. i missed playing cards - who woulda thunk it? we stayed at CD til about 1 AM.. then rory called me! I jumped, I think I coulda hit my head on the ceiling. haha. I could barely contain myself. haha. he was lonely, so I went over to his house and we hung out for a few hours. but, his housemates(?) came home, I was kinda sad, cuz I was getting up the courage to.... yea. but, maybe next time, he seemed kinda disappointed too. got home about 4:15 this morning. I should start coming home before 4....... but, i don't wanna. I'm not disturbing my parents, or not getting my stuff done, so I don't think they mind. that's cool.

Life is good. hopefully soon, it'll get even better - get a few things off my chest, and some other things I'm hoping for.

Alrighty, I'm out for now. Talk to you all later! :-)
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